Congleton: How do I choose the perfect funeral poem?
Poems have always been popular at funerals and are often included in a eulogy.
They can help you express your grief and provide the words you are not able to find yourself at a difficult time.
Award-winning poet and artist, Janet Lees, says: "A poem can say so much in so few words, expressing something huge and universal in an instant."
If you'd like to include poetry at your loved one's funeral, here are some tips on poetry readings for funerals and how to pick the perfect poem.
Why should I have poetry at a funeral?
Poems can form part of a eulogy or you can choose to have a separate poetry reading.
"Poetry is something we tend to reach for at the most emotionally charged times in our lives, Janet says, "from falling in love to losing someone close."
Poetry can be a connection to the person you've lost and may also give you more choice than traditional or religious readings.
Some popular poems include: Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep by Mary Elizabeth Fry, and Remember by Christiana Rossetti.
There are more contemporary choices, such as Funeral Blues by WH Auden, made famous by the film Four Weddings and a Funeral.
There are more humorous choices, like A Long Cup of Tea by Michael Ashby. Ones like these can help the funeral feel more modern or personal.
How do I choose a funeral poem?
Your loved one may have asked for a specific poem at their funeral, but if not, where do you turn if you're not usually a poetry fan?
The search can be quite an emotional process. Janet says, "the best way to choose is to hold the person you've lost in your heart and see which poem speaks to you."
Still not sure which poem to pick? See our selection of popular poems for funerals at the end of this article.
How do I give a funeral poetry reading?
To help prepare for the reading, practise the poem at home.
You don't need to memorise it, but it is important to have some recollection of it.
You could stick the poem to the fridge, to remind you to practise whenever you're in the kitchen. Try reading it aloud as naturally as possible.
Before you start reading the poem at the funeral, take a few deep breaths.
"Breathe into your abdomen, rather than your chest, hold for a second of two, then breathe out slowly. Don't worry about getting upset or crying. It's fine, says Janet.
"You're honouring your loved one with tears as well as with words."
Remember, there's no right or wrong poetry for a funeral, or 'proper' way to do a reading. If you find something that expresses how you feel about the person you love, that's the perfect poem to share with everyone else.
Popular funeral poems:
- Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep - Mary Elizabeth Frye
- Funeral Blues - WH Auden
- All is Well - Henry Scott Holland
- A Long Cup of Tea - Michael Ashby
- The Parting Glass - Irish Traditional
- If I Should Go Tomorrow - Author Unknown
- Life Goes on - Joyce Grenfell
- Feel No Guilt in Laughter, He'd Know How much You Care - Unknown Author
- To Sleep - John Keats
- Song - Christiana Rossetti
- Remember - Christiana Rossetti
- Remember Me - David Harkins
For help arranging a funeral, or bereavement support, please get in touch with Co-op Funeralcare in Congleton.
Please call them on 01260 270290, where there is someone available to speak to 24 hours a day.
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